Can We Reparent Ourselves?
I believe that so much of therapy is learning how to reparent ourselves.
None of us had perfect parents.
However, as adults we know what we needed as a child, and we have the opportunity and responsibility to give that to ourselves now that we are grown.
Much has been written about the inner child, that part of us that is innocent, curious, imaginative, and has a sense of wonder. I like to think of that little one inside as about five years old.
So how do we begin to communicate with that part of ourselves? How do we grow ourselves up to be healthy and loving adults?
Yes, we have limiting beliefs, big and small traumas, years of conditioning, and life's negative experiences to work through. But we can start with nurturing ourselves. We can start by letting that little one inside know that now there is an adult that can love us the way that we've wanted to be loved. That adult is you!
The definition of nurture is:
1. to care for, to nourish, to cherish, to support
2. to promote the development of by providing nourishment, support, encouragement, etc.
Opposites of nurture: neglect, disregard, ignore, overlook
Do you neglect to take care of yourself?
Do you disregard your feelings in favor of what someone else wants?
Do you ignore what you want because you think that it's not important or a good enough reason?
Do you overlook yourSelf in favor of anyone else?
Your little one inside is calling to you to nurture them.
How? Most of us have heard of random acts of kindness. These are “little sweet or grand lovely things we do for no reason except that, momentarily, the best of our humanity has sprung, exquisitely, into full bloom…”(Daphne Rose Kingma).
What would being kind to yourself look like? What is the best of your humanity that you can give to yourself - buying yourself flowers, speaking lovingly to yourself, going outside for a walk, etc.?
HOMEPLAY:
As homeplay, do at least one random act of kindness for yourself each day for one week and check in with yourSelf and see how you feel. Let me know if you notice any differences? Simply email me - I would love to hear from you!
Take good care of yourself,
- Leah